Game Report : Home Teams Season 7 {T-Wrecks vs Bad Omens; T-Wrecks vs Death Stars}

The last outing for our home teams was in November, so they were well overdue an airing on Saturday! The first event in this year's home teams calendar saw the T-Wrecks taking on last year's champions, the Bad Omens, followed by the Death Stars. Lightsabers were dusted off, dinosaur masks acquired and the Omens practised their best crow impressions - there's nothing like a bit of intraleague rivalry!

The poster for the Home Teams Season Opener - photos courtesy of Dave McAleavy.

The poster for the Home Teams Season Opener - photos courtesy of Dave McAleavy.


Game 1: Tyrannosaurus Wrecks vs Bad Omens

Taking to the track for the first time in a public game were Nitrojen for the T-Wrecks, and Katie Toerag, Sarah McGettigan, Spin Diesel and Tesla Recoil for the Bad Omens - they all did some spectacular things and we're proud of them all!

We were also glad to welcome some guest skaters from Ayrshire Roller Derby for the first game: Bambo and R2-Deck You, skating for the T-Wrecks. Also playing was the T-Wrecks' Rosalind Cracklin' who started fresh meat with GRD and now divides her time between Glasgow and Tel Aviv where she was integral to the set-up of their league!

Last year's winners the Bad Omens took an early lead, with the score at 18-23 in their favour after the first jam. They maintained their dominance until jam 4, when a fabulous effort from Sarah McMillan stacked on points for the T-Wrecks, resulting in a lead change ending the jam with the score 50-42. Six jams in, the T-Wrecks maintained their lead 69-46 and in jam 7 Bambo took full advantage of a power jam to take the score to 83-46 with up to three Bad Omens in the penalty box at various points during the jam. TW co-captain Jeneral Strike scored quickly in jam 9 and then called it, taking the scores to 91-46 and in jam 11 one of our newbies, Nitrojen, donned the star for a power jam and fought hard against tough opposition to squeeze out some points leaving the scores at 103-50. Shorty McLightning Pants jamming for the Bad Omens in jam 13 clearly did not suffer triskaidekaphobia and took lead jammer over Puma Thurman, got the points and called it to leave the half time score 107-70 to the T-Wrecks, despite a lovely spin noted by the commentators from Puma.

Tyrannosaurus Wrecks' guest Bambo showing off her jamming skills against the Bad Omens.

Tyrannosaurus Wrecks' guest Bambo showing off her jamming skills against the Bad Omens.

The second half opened with the Bad Omens trailing by 37 points, and both teams meant business with two Irn Bruisers squaring up on the jam line - Sarah McMillan for the T-Wrecks and Shorty McLightning Pants for the Bad Omens. Shorty quickly took lead but ended up in the penalty bin twice; McMillan capitalised and piled on the points with the jam ending 132-70. Two skaters making their track debut, Tesla Recoil and Nitrojen, faced off against each other in jam 3 with Nitro working hard to eventually get lead with Recoil sent to the bin alongside several T-Wrecks; the jam ended 162-71. Jam 5 saw another newbie, Spin Diesel, jamming but unfortunately getting a forearms penalty as she fought to pass the last blocker, leaving Strike to get lead and take the score to 187-74. Multiple Bad Omens spent time in the penalty box in jam 8 but Thurman made hard work of jamming for the dinos with Stargrazer taking lead for the Omens and calling the jam at 201-81. Following a quick ninth jam, the T-Wrecks called for a team timeout to discuss which of the Jurassic Park films were their favourite (Ed - I favour the original!)

Jam 10 saw some fresh blood lining up to jam with Penny Pinch'er for the Omens and Mad Natter for the T-Wrecks featuring on the jam line - 28 seconds later it was all over 205-85. One of our guests, R2-Deck You, took a jam against Shorty for number eleven; Shorty got lead and took advantage of it for an impressive thirty points, breaking the 100-point barrier - 205-115. The following jam started with Puma Thurman and Penny Pinch'er with the stars - Puma took lead and gained fifteen points while Penny passed the star to BO captain Janie Bones; the jam ended 220-115. Some malign Bad Omens influence made the next jam (number 13, again) the last one of the game and saw Spin Diesel against Rosalind Cracklin' (in hilarious niche feminist/science jokes, my note-taker for the game has documented this as Spin vs Watson & Crick).

Final score: T-Wrecks 220 - 135 Bad Omens

Thanks to the bench staff for all their support: Beav Aggressive as LUM/bench manager for Bad Omens, and LUM Maw Deuce with bench manager Submarine for T-Wrecks.


Best Blocker: Cara Viola 823
Best Jammer: Nitrojen 97
MVP: Mad Natter 3

Bad Omens
Best Blocker: Sadie O'Hades 311
Best Jammer: Spin Diesel 55
MVP: Shorty McLightning Pants 03

Game 2 : Tyrannosaurus Wrecks vs Death Stars

After a short break, the T-Wrecks were lining up again to face the fresh-faced, well-rested Death Stars and their evil Sith powers. Sarah McGettigan and Spin Diesel switched from the Bad Omens to guest for the T-Wrecks and the Death Stars had Bad Manders, Five Star Sylk, Roller Dobby, Sin Binner and Stripey guesting from Mean City Roller Derby.

The Death Stars' talents are not restricted to skating; they possess some excellent cabaret skills too.

The Death Stars' talents are not restricted to skating; they possess some excellent cabaret skills too.

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away, Marshall Lawless started off behind the jam line with TW co-captain Jeneral Strike; Lawless took the Death Stars to an early lead in jam 1 which ended 4-5 in favour of the Empire. The power of the dark side was evident again in jam 2, with Bruise Missile taking lead over Sarah McGettigan and calling it at 4-13. The third jam ended 7-13, and Sarah McMillan put some primordial pressure on the DS in jam 4 against Stripey; 11-13. The Death Stars pulled further ahead in jam 4 which finished 13-18 but the tide turned in favour of prehistory in jam 5: with Five Star Sylk sent to the bin, McGettigan seized lead for the TW and took full advantage of the power jam; lead change 38-18. The T-Wrecks' other guest Spin Diesel jammed next, against Bruise, and both scored points, taking it to 53-23. McMillan demonstrated the dominance of an apex predator in jam 8, ending at 62-23.

Following an official review, Strike took on Bruise for a few points each: 66-27. In jam 10, Lawless came tantalisingly close to getting lead, but cut track and got sent to the penalty box leaving Spin free to take lead and score points - despite being accidentally blocked by her teammate Puma Thurman! 72-36. Another official review, which wasn't upheld, preceded jam 11 in which TW's Nitrojen was sent off and lead jammer Stripey was made to earn every last point, calling it at a palindromic 74-47. In jam 12, Sylk took the lead against McMillan - the crowd went wild, but she was only able to add one point to the Death Stars' total, leaving the scoreline 74-48. The following jam ended with no-one gaining points as Bruise took lead but was nearly overtaken by Strike forcing her to call it. Phoenix Fatale landed a punishing hit on McGettigan in jam 14; the latter was then taken backwards round the track by Lawless jamming for DS, leaving a lot of people uncertain as to where she should re-enter the track on her minus-one pass. The confusion ended with the half time score static at 74-48.

Though the T-Wrecks maintained their lead for much of the first half, everyone was well aware that this could still be anyone's game with only 26 points between the teams. One good jam could change it all! McGettigan took the first jam of the half for TW against Bruise and was quickly sent off for a penalty. Bruise made it through the pack for lead jammer status, just as McGettigan re-entered the track, but was sent straight back off for cutting. 74-63. The dinosaurs started to feel the nerves as jam 2 opened as a power jam for Lawless who easily took lead - the TW star was passed to Strike and the jam ended 82-79.

Another official review to keep the officials on their toes was followed by jam 3, with a cameo from DS captain Haberbashery wearing her team's star. She took the lead but was then sent to the bin for a penalty; Strike made the Death Stars pay in the power jam, which ended 97-80. Spin jammed in the fourth but was dominated by Sylk's defense, 110-101. Jam 5 was a power jam for McMillan who then cut track, leaving it open for Bruise to score an easy few for the Death Stars, but McMillan brought it back with an apex jump - 123-110. Sylk took the lead in jam 6 against Strike but called it quickly for zero points all round. McMillan faced guest skater Stripey in number seven and dominated for the dinosaurs, 133-112.

Jam 8 took a while to warm up, with Lawless jamming for the DS eventually taking lead, but she was then overtaken by Strike who managed to score a few. 143-117. Strike jammed again in the ninth against Sylk; the former ended up in the penalty box but Sylk struggled to make her pay and the jam ended 143-118. Jam 10 then saw Bruise sent off early on for a back block, leaving a power jam for Puma who struggled against some awesome defense and was knocked off the inside twice and taken back. An exasperated Puma star passed to TW co-captain Shona Mercy who managed to score some; the jam ended 148-126.

The Death Stars then called a team timeout, presumably to discuss whether or not the prequels should really be considered part of the Star Wars franchise or if we should just never talk about them again. The debate clearly re-energised Lawless, who blasted through the pack in jam 11 against McMillan, but was then contained by the T-Wrecks' defense and called it 157-135.

Not wanting to feel left out, the T-Wrecks called a team timeout to consider the relative evolutionary disadvantage of having such tiny arms but concluded that size isn't everything. The twelfth and final jam of the game pitted Lawless against infrequent jammer Cara Viola - Lawless made it through first, but with a no-pass-no-penalty, leaving Cara to take lead jammer and, once time had expired, call off the jam for a T-Wrecks victory!

Final score: T-Wrecks 157 - 143 Death Stars

They even just about managed to get all of the T-Wrecks in the same photo, without the use of a selfie stick! Just look how pleased they are at taking the win in both games.

They even just about managed to get all of the T-Wrecks in the same photo, without the use of a selfie stick! Just look how pleased they are at taking the win in both games.

Thanks to the bench staff for all their support: LUM Scara-Leigh and bench manager Trucks Norris for the Death Stars and the T-Wrecks bench staff unchanged from the first game.


Best Blocker: Cara Viola 823
Best Jammer: Sarah McMillan 7
MVP: Jeneral Strike 789

Death Stars
Best Blocker: Phoenix Fatale 507
Best Jammer: Bruise Missile 77
MVP: Marshall Lawless 42

Thanks as always to everyone who made today possible - referees, non-skating officials, photographers, volunteers, stall holders, EMTs and everyone else. And to the crowd who came along and showed their support for all of the teams: it was a lovely atmosphere and we all had such a wonderful time!

If that's whetted your appetite for EVEN MORE ROLLER DERBY, then keep an eye on our Events Page for more info on some Edinburgh-based fun in early August or some home games at the end of the same month. And if you've picked a side in the eternal battle between the home teams then you've got until the end of June to take advantage of the 10% discount off the relevant merch in our online store - and why not treat yourself to other GRD goodness while you're there?!

For now, we're signing off for a well-earned fortnight of rest for the league - see you on the other side!